Miscellanea Sensibilium

Calm and balanced essay on religion. And that includes discordianism.

As religions and things like them have ocurred independantly throughout history and across the world its safe to assume they have a purpose (no! don't mention haemorrhoids! shut up about your arse for one minute!). This cannot possibly be the conveyance of information, as the most successful religions seem to centre on patent bollocks, such as "it rains because God opens windows in the sky to let water in", much of which isn't even clearly stated enough to even aspire to being WRONG.

Therefore this purpose must be other than informative: it must serve an emotional or ego need, like that nice man who cuts you up and covers you in bruises and calls you a whore. (That was just an example. And shut up about your goddam arse-grapes already.)

Furthermore it must serve this purpose well, as religious people tend to live longer (true! possibly.) and are infuriatingly sanctimonious and smug.

Therefore we should allow people who wish to partake in this beneficial activity that liberty - but a line must be drawn, as for other spiritually beneficial activities which occur penalties in other realms, stating where this efficacy comes to its end. Some sort of intellectual health-warning, taking up one-third of the cover of any missal, prayer-book, pamphlet, scripture or theological tract in this vein:

"Believing this qualifies you as an idiot

60% apocrypha

40% hyperbole"

or words to that effect. Providing people remember to insert the stuff into the correct mental 'port' (look SHUT UP OK), and refrain from giving any of it a moments credence, everything should be just fine.